I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two words...techno handjob
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize