Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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