I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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