beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
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