4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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