She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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