Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
