Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize