there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Randomize
