i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
