Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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