would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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