Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
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