She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
