And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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