pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize