I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Randomize