Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
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the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
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Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
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