guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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