I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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