Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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