Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
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