chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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