im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize