stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Randomize
