...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
nutella sex= disaster
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
