is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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