Sober January is a disaster.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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