The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
