super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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