Dual....:-)
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
