There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
