Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
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Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize