Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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