Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
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