careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
