Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize