i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
