She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize