Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
