lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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