just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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