Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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