I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize