you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
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