i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot