Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
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He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
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