so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Randomize
