That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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