coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
Drunk is not a location!
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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