I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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